Tuesday, December 9, 2008
My Katrina Article I dont remember if it got publish
That whore of Mother Nature has given birth to extremely volatile bitches, also known as hurricanes Katrina, Rita, and Wilma. I understand that this is a very touchy subject, so I will do my best to uphold the memory of all those who suffered during those destructive times. However, there are so many positives that need to be seen in the wake of the horrendous and tragic events. For instance, it is because of the hurricanes that there are fewer amounts of cars and fewer people, which contributes to population control and cheaper gas prices. Another great occurrence that comes with the beauty of these storms is the clearing of the land. The residents of New Orleans already knew those buildings were old and crumbling; the storms just gave them a reason to rebuild. The reconstruction efforts will lead to new housing projects, thus creating a boom in the economy. In fact, these hurricanes can be seen as a blessing in disguise. I mean Donald trump bought up all the land down there and look what he did for NBC and The Apprentice. Also, an online poll took a survey of people who knew how to swim before and after the storm and amazingly, numerous amounts of people knew how to swim afterwards. Another intriguing result of the survey shows the amount of people who knew how to swim with objects. This has even lead to a surge in the book industry with the popular title, “How to Use Your Furniture as a Flotation Device for Dummies.” These people should also be thankful for the once in a lifetime opportunity that has been presented to them. Realistically, how many of these people would have gotten the chance to meet such celebrities as Oprah, crazy Sean Penn, or Old man Tommy Lee. They have personally come down from Mt. Olympus to help us mere mortals in our time of need and God only knows how many autograph books were filled. I speak on their behalf when I say, Thank You Katrina. So while people complain of the constant flow of water due to all the flooding, remember that you will not have to worry about problems such as a drought. Do they even take the time to think about how many people are dying in Africa because of droughts? Of course not. Plus, how many Red Cross workers and Salvation Army heads have gained bonuses from the nice donations being donated? You know they are getting a nice chunk of change from that. Lastly, while we saw the blacks “looting” goods and the whites “finding” those same goods, the basic lesson is hurricanes bring everyone free shit.